( it feels like morning, the way kaoru hangs over him, and, like a beast on a rock, he reclines into it; how warm it seems to feel. he has no particular excuse for this by way of transformation; kaoru has always been so naturally sunny, and he has this sort of breeze about him that clears away the clouds.
he is satisfied, until the churning of emotion laps against that early morning haze in his head, and then crashes over with a great grateful wetness, completely unlike rei's own simple thanks just moments earlier. it wakes him up much quicker when he settles his gaze on the glossy look in kaoru's eyes; that little swelling of tears; the faint raggedness of his breath.
this isn't sadness...? but it looks like it? but what is there for kaoru to be so happy about? ah, if only knowing how someone felt meant you understood it. to rei, it's all contradiction, and it's all uncharacteristic for kaoru at equilibrium. he tries—though with some effort—to push himself up half way, to get himself more alert, even if it doesn't fully work quite yet. )
Kaoru-kun...? Did something happen?
( tentatively, so tentatively, he reaches out to brush his fingers along the edge of kaoru's eye, catching kaoru's warm tears on his pale skin.
how gentle, like the rest of him. how delicate, too; kaoru wasn't the sort to show his worries to another, but rei had always had the sense he was the type of person easy to bruise. he only barely touches kaoru's skin with his fingertips, as if he's afraid to hurt him.
(but perhaps it's simply convenient to have someone fragile as kaoru around; how wonderful it is, to have an excuse to refrain from getting closer. if he were to reach out fully to comfort him, the way he had asked after kaoru last night, would kaoru reject him? rei doesn't have to know.)
—but he still, )
... Do you want to lie here with me?
( —but he still wants so badly to comfort him, the way he had the night of the full moon before last. he wants so badly to let kaoru press himself into his shoulder, and let the warmth of his shuddering breaths and the heat of his tears sink into his body, until it left kaoru try. even if he's afraid, even if he's afraid, he wants to try.
his palm presses soft again his cheek, almost as if cupping it, even if it's not quite. )
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he is satisfied, until the churning of emotion laps against that early morning haze in his head, and then crashes over with a great grateful wetness, completely unlike rei's own simple thanks just moments earlier. it wakes him up much quicker when he settles his gaze on the glossy look in kaoru's eyes; that little swelling of tears; the faint raggedness of his breath.
this isn't sadness...? but it looks like it? but what is there for kaoru to be so happy about? ah, if only knowing how someone felt meant you understood it. to rei, it's all contradiction, and it's all uncharacteristic for kaoru at equilibrium. he tries—though with some effort—to push himself up half way, to get himself more alert, even if it doesn't fully work quite yet. )
Kaoru-kun...? Did something happen?
( tentatively, so tentatively, he reaches out to brush his fingers along the edge of kaoru's eye, catching kaoru's warm tears on his pale skin.
how gentle, like the rest of him. how delicate, too; kaoru wasn't the sort to show his worries to another, but rei had always had the sense he was the type of person easy to bruise. he only barely touches kaoru's skin with his fingertips, as if he's afraid to hurt him.
(but perhaps it's simply convenient to have someone fragile as kaoru around; how wonderful it is, to have an excuse to refrain from getting closer. if he were to reach out fully to comfort him, the way he had asked after kaoru last night, would kaoru reject him? rei doesn't have to know.)
—but he still, )
... Do you want to lie here with me?
( —but he still wants so badly to comfort him, the way he had the night of the full moon before last. he wants so badly to let kaoru press himself into his shoulder, and let the warmth of his shuddering breaths and the heat of his tears sink into his body, until it left kaoru try. even if he's afraid, even if he's afraid, he wants to try.
his palm presses soft again his cheek, almost as if cupping it, even if it's not quite. )